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Imagine that your boss has been on vacation for the last week so you haven’t bothered to shave. It’s currently 7am, your boss just flew in, and you both have an 8am meeting with the CEO. Company dress code requires a clean-shaven face, but you’re looking pretty scruffy.
You grab your can of shaving cream only to discover it’s empty. You shake it as hard as you can and squeeze that button, but there’s not a drop left in the can. The situation seems hopeless, but not if you’ve got a jar of peanut butter in your cupboard!
Yes, you can shave your furry face with peanut butter!
Peanut butter is tasty and versatile at the same time. Provided you don’t have a peanut allergy, you can shave your face with peanut butter the same way you would with shaving cream. Peanut butter has some serious glide and will get you a clean, close shave.
Preparing for a peanut butter wet shave
First things first – prepare your face! If you’re running short on time, splash some hot water on your face several times to soften up your skin. If you’ve got time and you have a shaving ritual, prepare your face as you normally would.
Grab a jar of smooth peanut butter (or crunchy if that’s all you have) and use the back of a spoon to smear it on your face. If you plan on eating the rest of the jar, you probably don’t want to double-dip. Another option is to wear vinyl gloves and scoop out a big chunk at once and use both hands to smear it all over your face and neck. Gloves will make it easier to wash the oil off your hands. Don’t use your shaving brush with peanut butter – it’s unnecessary and you’ll ruin the brush.
If you don’t like the idea of getting your hands oily, wear a clean pair of gloves while you shave. If gloves make it hard for you to grip your razor, cut the fingertips off so you can grab the handle.
Oh, and remember to shave over the sink to catch any drops of peanut butter. Sometimes peanut butter oil can stain clothing, furniture, and carpets.
The secrets to a creamy peanut butter shave
It doesn’t matter what kind of razor you use – you can get a smooth shave with peanut butter. Of course, using a safety razor normally produces the closest shave with the least amount of effort and that applies to a peanut butter shave, too.
It’s far easier to wipe peanut butter off a single-blade safety razor than it is a five-blade cartridge razor, but we’ll get to cleaning your razor in a moment.
Once your face looks like one-half of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, you’re ready to shave like usual. If you use disposable razors like this guy, you’ll probably need to use multiple razors to get the job done. Hopefully you’ve switched to a double-edged safety razor by now. If so, shaving with peanut butter will be much easier.
Just don’t let your dog lick your face after you’re done. Your pores might still be open and you don’t want any dog germs getting into your bloodstream.
How to clean the peanut butter off your razor
When shaving with peanut butter you’ll notice it sticks to the razor more than shaving cream. Peanut butter oil is stickier than shaving cream or shaving soap. You can’t just rinse your razor with water and expect the peanut butter to come off. To clean your razor between strokes, use a cotton swab to wipe your blade (or blades if you’re using a multi-blade cartridge razor). A cotton swab will get between the blades better and remove more build-up.
Peanut butter makes a fantastic moisturizer
If you normally choose your shaving cream or soap based on how well it moisturizes your skin, you’re in luck! Peanut butter oil is great for your skin and won’t dry out your face. Peanut oil is commonly used in soap as a moisturizing ingredient.
Peanut oil is great for your health
There are plenty of health benefits of using peanut oil that extend beyond your shaving ritual. Peanut oil is rich in vitamin E, which has been shown to fight free radicals that cause heart disease. It’s also rich in monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats, which are associated with a reduced risk of heart disease.
Some people apply peanut oil topically to delay signs of aging, treat dry skin, and treat scalp psoriasis.
Just peanut butter – hold the jelly
If you grew up eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, you might start craving one after lathering up. No matter what stunts you see people pulling online, don’t use jelly to shave your face. Jelly has no lubricating properties and you’ll end up tearing up your skin.
How to avoid smelling like a walking jar of peanut butter
To prevent your co-workers calling you “peanut butter face” when they catch a whiff of you, wash your face a couple of times with some scented soap, use a rough wash cloth and hot water to scrub off the oil, and then slap on some aftershave.
Showing up for a meeting with the CEO reeking like peanut butter is probably worse than showing up unshaven. The good news is, most people say the smell of peanuts isn’t that strong after they shave.
If people notice and you’re too embarrassed to tell them you shaved your face with peanut butter, bring a half-eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich with you to work and make people think they’re just smelling your lunch.
Will peanut butter replace shaving cream?
You can use peanut butter to shave anytime; you don’t need to be out of shaving cream. A jar of peanut butter is less expensive than a can of shaving cream and a big jar will last much longer. If you buy organic peanut butter you don’t have to worry about harsh chemicals found in commercial shaving creams.
We probably won’t see peanut butter down the shaving aisle anytime soon, but there is hope that peanut butter will become a backup tool in shaving kits across the world.
Speaking of shaving kits, don’t forget to pick up a safety razor for your kit. Shaving is enjoyable with the right tools and it all starts with having a high-quality, sharp razor.